


Lost Boys

by Theresalwaysamystery



Series: The Lost and the Weary [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Claustrophobia, Coping mechanisms., Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I mean, Keith and Lance are taken prisoner together, Keith has flashbacks and anxiety, PTSD, Platonic Klance for now, Platonic Relationships, Sickfic, That sort of thing will do havoc on anyone's mental state., angst and nightmares too, becasue as much as i ship them i love the whole found family dynamic and i'd rather write that, but it's evolved so much since then, dont worry Shiro and Lance are there to help, hurt fic, i'll add more tags as i post more chapters., none of the Paladins dealt with missing their family very well, panic attacks in later chapters too, pidge is protective and savage always, they were gone for a month., this is part 1 of the aftermath, this was originally supposed to be a oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-28
Updated: 2017-07-27
Packaged: 2018-11-20 11:46:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11335044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theresalwaysamystery/pseuds/Theresalwaysamystery
Summary: "So being part human saved Keith, but being entirely human is what’s killing Lance?"





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If you're here i hope you enjoy pain. Feel free to message me if you're wondering about triggers, and i'll do my best to lay it out for you- (in this chapter there are mentions of blood as well as the smell that comes with infected wounds.) 
> 
> Thanks to Dragon_Stone for beta-ing this chapter!
> 
> [Also- come babble at me on tumblr at iwouldntmissitfortheworld :)]

 

Shiro flinched at a small hand on his shoulder. He was in Black’s bay—although he wasn’t _with_ Black, per se—he was sitting against the wall, looking at his Lion, and wondering how it all could have gone so wrong so fast.

He looked up and met Katie’s haunted eyes with his own. Smiling sadly, he reached up with his left hand to give her fingers a reassuring squeeze.

“You didn’t come to dinner,” she frowned.

Oh. Was it that late already?

“Here.” She placed a bowl in his lap. “Hunk—” she paused, as though she wasn’t quite sure what to say. “Hunk’s been cooking. He spends as much time in there as you do in here.”

 _To each their own_ , he supposed.

The only time they were ever all in the same place lately was when the alarms went off, or when they flew. Occasionally Allura would fly Blue, or Red, but only when it was determined that she wouldn’t be better off flying the castle. They couldn’t form Voltron regardless of whether or not she took a Paladin’s seat, so most of the time she simply chose not to. Within the remaining Paladins, they didn’t really mind. It was easier to stay focused when there wasn’t that split second of relief that came with seeing the Lion of a lost Pilot fly, and the pain of realization that came with it.

He couldn’t speak for Black’s feelings; they wouldn’t tell him, and that alone lead him to assume that Black was in pain.

As she had nearly every day since Their boys had been taken, Katie sprawled herself and her equipment on the floor in front of him.

She didn’t ask him how he was; she already knew. She didn’t try to help him, there was nothing she could say. She knew better than to expect a response, so she didn’t talk. She simply worked on finding their lost family members.

Eventually, her eyelids began to droop, and Shiro stood; ready to carry her to her room if need be. He might not be able to be—all there, for Hunk and Katie right now; but he refused to let them wear themselves thin. He was responsible for all of the Paladins, both the lost, and the weary. That would never change.

Katie groaned and walked under her own control towards her sleeping quarters, but did nothing to dissuade Shiro from putting his hand over her shoulder. He needed the contact as much as she did, she understood how he felt.

They stopped at her door, and Shiro watched to make sure she put her equipment away. He wouldn’t be able to sleep if he knew she was still working somewhere, she knew that too.

He almost left without a word, as had become habit.

Something changed his mind.

“We’ll find them,” he said hoarsely. “We’ll find them.”

“Of course we will.” Katie replied. It was the only possibility.

 

* * *

 

Katie stared at her screen for a long time before she realized what she was looking at.

“C-Coran” she said nervously. “Can you come verify this for me?”

The Altean was working on the other side of the room, and looked up in surprise at her voice. “Of course! I’ll be just a tick!”

Pidge nodded.

It was about thirty impatient ticks later that he finally read through what she’d found. “Could this be?” he asked, upon examining the data Pidge had collected on her tablet.

The usual methods hadn’t worked. They hadn’t been able to track them through BLIP, through the Lions, even through Allura’s new Quintessence abilities-

It had been a long shot- but finally it seemed like she’d found something that could scan through whatever interference was being broadcasted to hide the Red and Blue Paladins from the Castle.

She bit her lip, and for the first time in weeks, began to genuinely smile.

 

* * *

 

From there it was only a matter of organizing and implementing the rescue. Some space ‘Pirates’, for want of a better word, had snatched Lance and Keith almost three weeks prior from a celebration hosted by a planet they had liberated. The Paladin’s inability to locate them so far had been—frustrating; to say the least.

Disheartening might have been a better word.

Now though, she had found them. _Finally_ , she’d found them.

It was decided that she would fly the three of them in using Green’s cloaking technology, and Leave Allura and Coran on the Castle ship as backup and cover.

Shiro and Hunk would go get Lance and Keith, using a smaller version of the device Pidge that had put together to find their lost paladins in the first place.

She would set off explosives at key points with the use of a program of her own design from the nearest computer terminal, and then defend their exit with Green.

They would get their lost boys back.

 

* * *

 

Hunk dogged Shiro’s heels as the Black Paladin followed two lonely dots on the holo-map Pidge had uploaded into his armour.

He swallowed thickly as they ran through the ship, trying his hardest not to gag, and even harder not to throw up.

When Lance and Keith had first been taken, they’d heard stories about the pirates, the unilos who had stolen them. Many of the locals, and their host government at the time had horrible tales, and they’d gathered every scrap of intel they could.

It seemed the Galra put up with the Pirates because from time to time, they actually delivered useful intel. As long as they didn’t get in the way of the Galra, the Galra didn’t care.

The pirates also didn’t have a planet they could call home—much like the Paladins they preferred to work out of a ship—and they were notorious for turning off non-essential systems, often hiding out in space junk when they had captives. This made it incredibly difficult to track them, (especially given the vast amount of new space junk that had accumulated due to the Galra in the past ten thousand years, the voids of the universe differed greatly from the Castle’s maps).

As Hunk walked the halls, the stench of pain and fear in the air nearly overwhelmed him. The scent of blood and vomit stung his lungs with every breath, as if death itself was caught in his throat. The ship was dark—running on minimal power—but Pidge had hacked its defences before they boarded. Hopefully they would have time before the breach was detected.

Hunk’s fought back the instinct to inhale deeply, something that normally settled his nerves and stomach. In this place a deep breath would probably just make the nausea worse.

Then he thought about how this was where Lance had been for the last few weeks. This was where Keith had been. He swallowed his gag reflex back again, not wanting to throw up on such an vital mission.

At least they were together, right? That had to count for something.

Shiro turned to him, and pointed at the dots on the screen. Lance and Keith were behind the door in front of them. Once they went through it, it was doubtful they would remain unnoticed. There might even be someone in there with Lance and Keith, He and Shiro couldn’t know, the device tracked Quintessence signatures; not life signs. Shiro was asking: was he ready?

Hunk nodded. Of course he was ready. He just wanted to get them _back_.

Nothing, could have prepared him for the sight inside. Keith and Lance were both chained to opposite sides of the room. Keith sat against the wall, his eyes frantic as he heard the door open, and scared as he skittered backwards. Lance was lying down, and his eyes slit open as they broke down the door. They were both decorated with blood, any skin that could be seen though their ruined civilian clothing was caked in red, and each of their faces sported splotches of blue and black. It wasn’t hard to imagine that the rest of their thin frames didn’t as well.

“Keith?” Shiro said slowly, moving through the door. “Lance?”

“It’s going to be alright,” Hunk spoke softly as he approached Lance, not wanting to scare either of them and he saw Shiro doing the same with Keith. “We’re getting you out of here.”

Lance continued to look at him blankly, before turning his head slightly to Keith. “Keith?” He asked nervously, “do you-?”

Keith nodded nervously. “Yeah, I do.”

In an instant, Lance’s face broke out in relief as he tried to sit up. “I knew it. I knew you guys would come.”

“Of course we came.” Hunk soothed, while part of his brain registered what had just happened.

“They’re-?” Keith looked over at Lance, the question in his eyes: _they’re real_?

Lance nodded, and Keith reached out and grabbed Shiro’s wrist, a desperate need in his eyes to make sure for himself. Shiro smiled worriedly, and reached forwards with his mechanical arm to cut him free of the cuffs and chain holding him to the wall. “Hold still,” he murmured.

Hunk was still trying to assess all of Lance’s injuries when Shiro came over, Keith’s arm was pulled across his shoulder to support the Red Paladin. Shiro used his prosthetic to carefully slice Lance’s chains, and it hurt hunk to see how Lance first winced away before turning his wrist to make Shiro’s job easier. Hunk helped Lance to stand, and Lance immediately lurched for Keith, wincing as he pulled him into a desperate hug, while Keith buried his face into Lance’s neck. The result was an odd embrace in which both participants were barely upright, but didn’t seem to care.

“Did you find them yet?” Pidge’s voice crackled over his helmet comms, and Hunk smiled.

“Yep, we found them. Neither of them are looking too good though. They’re definitely gonna need those pods. We’re on our way back now, let’s get out of this dump!”

Shiro nodded at him, and they each took their respective charge.

“Hunk-“ Keith started, determined, “Lance can’t walk.” Lance scoffed slightly at the implication that he’d need to be carried, but Hunk simply nodded and swept him up into his strong arms, bridal style. Shiro toyed with the idea of doing the same with Keith and eventually chose not to, letting him walk on his own.

Hunk and Shiro exchanged a significant look as they progressed down the hall. Both boys were clearly malnourished, but of the two Lance was definitely in worse shape. He had what looked to Hunk like an infection setting into a very deep gash in his leg, and the way he cringed as Hunk carried him, there was probably a wound just as bad on his abdomen. Keith was pale, covered in cuts and bruises, but the most worrisome thing about him was that his eyes would dart from side to side. At those points he would press as close into Shiro’s side as he could, for comfort, or support, or both. Keith was determined not to let whatever it was slow him down, and Hunk could only surmise that he was seeing things the others couldn’t. That wasn’t good.

The Pirate’s ship wasn’t big- and it wasn’t long before they could hear Pidge fighting in front of them. Damnit, they’d hoped to be gone before the pirates knew they were there.

“Pidge, why didn’t you say something?” Hunk yelled as both he and Shiro gently put Lance and Keith down just around the corner, hopefully in a defensible enough position that they would be alright while the other three fought their way out.

“Wouldn’t have changed anything!” she shouted back, and one of the attacking party fell with a shock from her Bayard. “Finally!” she shouted, “they have some kind of armour that absorbs kinetic energy, look for the chinks!”

“Nicely done Pidge” Shiro praised as his hits now started to find their mark, and both she and Hunk stole a short moment to stare at him in shock. Ever since Keith and Lance had been taken, he hadn’t been one to say much. It was odd to hear him speak so freely.

Between the three of them, and Pidge’s keen observations, the battle was over quickly. The last Pirate fell, and without hesitation Pidge ran to ready Green. Hunk and Shiro raced back to where they’d left Keith and Lance, eager to get them home and safe and healing as soon as physically possible.

“Keith,” Hunk heard Lance muttering weakly, the combination of physical exertion and emotional turmoil clearly taking its toll as he and Keith lay in the dark hall of the ghostly space ship. He had one hand pressed around the Red Paladin’s middle, which was now covered in blood. The other was trying to hold Keith’s head steady as Lance’s own body shook with sobs. “Keith, Keith, no- why- Keith-“

In front of them was a dead guard. Keith was holding his Luxite Blade tight, and sporting a new blossom of red around his abdomen where he’d been hit. Hunk swore under his breath as he realized from Keith’s position on the floor, that he’d taken a hit to protect Lance.

Shiro’s eyes widened in terror as he came around the corner right behind Hunk, and he dropped to his knees, quickly gathering Keith in his arms. “You idiot.” He mumbled. “I didn’t give you your blade back so that you could go and get yourself killed. You stay with me, you hear? Stay.”

Hunk could see the tears in Shiro’s eyes, and felt wet tracks down his own cheeks as he gathered Lance in his own arms and ignored the Blue Paladin’s cry of protest when he no longer had physical contact with Keith as both he and Shiro sprinted to Green.

“Hurry Pidge! Go!” Hunk yelled as his feet touched the ramp.

Pidge gave a small worried gasp as they all fell messily to the floor of Green then nodded, her jaw set in determination and her eyes glistening with tears.

Keith groaned as Shiro applied pressure to his new wound, and the Black Paladin fumbled with Green’s first aid kit, various supplies landing everywhere as her frantically searched for something to stop the bleeding.

“ ’S not as bad as it looks,” Keith said, “promise-“ he lurched over to the side and coughed, blood tinging his lips and teeth pink as it dripped into a small puddle on the floor.

“You’re going to be fine.” Shiro told to him, his voice less certain than Hunk had ever heard. “We’re almost there, its gonna be alright Keith, it’s gonna be fine.”

Hunk was trying to wrap Lance’s leg with a clean bandage rather than the dirty torn up shirt that Lance had used in their prison. The wound had opened up again in their escape and Hunk was doing his best not to vomit at the sight of blood, and the smell the wound produced. Vomit wouldn’t help anything. Lance bit his lip hard enough to draw blood as he tried not to cry out, and Hunk apologized profusely as he pulled the gauze taught around Lance’s leg.

“You’re both going to be fine.” Shiro insisted, and looked over at Hunk with panic in his heart.

 

“Pidge;" he begged, " _Hurry_.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> /Lance,/ he thought, /you better be okay. I don’t know what I’ll do if you aren’t okay./

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is where the madness started, it's actually the first chapter i wrote for this fic :-P  
> Thanks to Dragon_Stone for beta-ing and putting up with my constant need to edit /just one more time/, and to my bestie and her help figuring out some of the logistics here :-O  
> Possible triggers in this chapter include: panic attacks, mentions of claustrophobia, slight flashback.  
> Thanks for reading! Kudos and Comments are always loved!

Come visit me on Tumblr at [iwouldntmissitfortheworld](http://iwouldntmissitfortheworld.tumblr.com) :D I'd love to hear from you! 

* * *

 

Keith stumbled forwards as the glass dropped away. Strong hands reached out to steady him, and he leaned into them, grateful for the support. At nearly the same moment, he felt a warmth rush through his essence that could only be his Lion.

Red. He could feel Red. After spending weeks without it, having his Lion's steady presence back in his mind was enough to wipe away all of his doubt. It meant that escaping hadn’t all been a dream, that the rescue- it had been real.

 _Red_ , he asked, mostly just to hear her response. _This means I’m back, doesn’t it? We’re home?_ There was a slight rumble in the back of his mind that could only be a purr, the sort Red saved for when he really needed them. Keith smiled. _I’ll come and see you later, alright?_

He wasn’t exactly sure why he was putting off visiting his Lion, but Red didn’t seem to mind; he could tell she had something to do as well; something to do with Blue...

“Keith?"  Something cut into his thoughts, "How are you feeling?” The voice was hesitant, but strong, and Keith would have known it anywhere.

“Shiro.” He exhaled in relief, blinking several times in an effort to clear his vision. Gingerly he tested his weight on his cryo-pod jelly legs, and found they could adequately support him. He nodded slowly.

“I’m… better.” He said the word carefully, but he’d chosen it mostly because it seemed like the right thing to say. “And Red is certainly glad I’m out. Thanks for the catch. How long was I in there?”

"Not nearly as long as we thought you might be," Shiro replied cautiously, "about eight hours. And I’ll be here anytime, you know that. As long as I can be here for you, I will.” They both grimaced at his unconscious reference to his own disappearance. “Let’s go grab something to eat?” Shiro suggested, “and then you can sleep off the rest of the pod’s effects.”

Keith shook his head. There was something more important than food, or sleep, something that he needed to check on... Keith looked around, absolutely expecting to find a pod filled with their favourite obnoxious brunet. His heart rate sped up as he scanned the room and saw no other pods in use; there was no way Lance had gotten out of the pod before he had, there was no way, not in his condition... So where—? He accidentally pulled himself away from Shiro’s supporting arm in his frantic search for Lance, and stumbled a few feet into the middle of the room, spinning wordlessly as he scanned the infirmary. Shiro hurried forward to support him again, and gently guided the younger Paladin towards the door as he pulled Keith’s arm back over his shoulder

“Lance? Where’s Lance, is he- Shiro? Where’s Lance?” Keith’s tone grew louder and more anxious by the second, and he craned his neck trying to see into the room their leader was leading him out of.

Shiro rushed to reassure him as best as he could. “Keith, Lance is—“ he fumbled over his words, “he’s alright for now, he's not here though, he’s just—sleeping in his room-“

“His room? But why-?” There was a moment of confusion followed by horror as Keith put emotions and instincts together. “He never went into a pod did he?” As much as he hated it, the instant Keith said the words, he knew he was right. “He’s still hurt, isn’t he?” Keith’s pulse kept a speedy beat. That planet— those pirates— _Lance_ \- Keith needed to see him, he needed to see him _now_.

Shiro bit his lip, and for an instant pain flashed across his face before he expertly buried it. He nodded slightly. “Yeah. He’s still a little rough-“

Keith shook his head frantically. “I want to see him.” He needed to see him, he needed to be there-

“Keith-“

Keith looked up at the face of the man he called his brother. “Shiro, he’s more than ‘a little rough.'" He could feel the truth of those words in his soul, and also in the echo of pain that Red felt from Blue in the back of his mind. A small part of his mind realized that that was what Red had wanted to do; but even as he sent Red a psychic emotional bundle of support he held on to Shiro’s gaze like a lost child, hoping with all his heart that Shiro would tell him he was wrong.

No such luck. The pain and guilt in the Black Paladin’s eyes quickly validated Keith’s worst fears. Lance was hurt _bad_.

“This is my fault.” Keith furiously wiped away moisture at the corner of his eyes, pulling slightly away from Red to spare his Lion the emotional wreckage of his mind. “I want to see him.”

“Keith, it’s not your fault.” There was no room for argument in Shiro's tone. “None of this is your fault.”

Keith ducked his head in response to the guilt that comment produced, and Shiro gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze.

"Not your fault." Shiro repeated, his voice no less certain than before. "So... Lance, or food?" he asked, trying to bring Keith back on point.

"Lance," he said immediately, "I need to see Lance."

Shiro nodded as he wrapped an arm securely around Keith’s back, and finished guiding him out of the infirmary. “We'll have to keep quiet though, alright? Allura and Coran said it’s best if he sleeps most of this off.”

Keith nodded, before realizing he had no idea what Shiro meant. “Wait-“ he asked, “what exactly is, ‘this’, Shiro?”

“How much do you remember?”

He thought for a moment. “Not much. I remember them questioning us, and-” he took a breath, “not liking what we told them.” He winced as his mind supplied images and the faded pain of torture, and Shiro rubbed his shoulder sympathetically. “I remember you guys showing up, and you got us out of there—” he paused in his retelling, brows furrowed as he tried to recall what happened next-

He remembered the rescue, some of it at least, and getting back to the castle; then he heard Shiro say they were going to be fine, that everything would be fine, Shiro had said-  
-then it had been bright- way too bright, and his head, and it had been hard to think, and to breath, and to-  
-Coran had had the regeneration pods waiting, they’d been prepared for them-  
-wait… the pods- the pods—Oh no, no-no-no  
Lance had been panicking, he’d been screaming, and kicking, and fighting, and something was _wrong_ and the sounds he was making weren’t human and he was just going to make that gash in his leg worse-  
-Keith had to fix it, he had to see him, he had to do something, he had to get to him, he had to talk to him, he had to--

“Keith?”

Keith’s eyes flickered up to meet Shiro’s worried gaze, barely registering the fear that had taken up residence in his eyes.

“Lance-“ he gasped, searching for oxygen but not finding any, "Lance-"

Shiro quickly fell back into an older pattern, no doubt remembering a much younger Keith, and a much less complicated time. “Keith,” he said gently, “you need to breathe. You’re fine, you’re safe, you’re both safe now.” His voice was steady, low, and reassuring. He gently took one of Keith’s shaking hands and placed it on his chest. “Look around you. We’re in the Castle. I won’t hurt you. Just breathe with me.”

Keith nodded, and tried his hardest to follow along with Shiro’s even breaths. It worked. When he felt relatively in control again, Keith shifted his hand from Shiro’s chest to his shoulder, and squeezed gently. Shiro caught him with an even gaze, and Keith nodded in thanks.

As anxiety attacks go it wasn’t as bad as it could have been, or even as he’d dealt with in the past, but they were never nice.

Shiro shook his head slightly, they’d been here before. “Alright, you need to get to bed, we’ll go see Lance when you’ve rested-“

“No.”

Shiro pulled back, startled by the sudden ferocity and conviction in Keith’s voice. “Keith- you’re exhausted.”

“I’m sorry, Shiro- but I need- I need to see him. Please?”

Shiro was hesitant. “Are you sure?”

Keith nodded.

It took a few moments, but Shiro eventually nodded back. “Okay. But this? What just happened? We’re going to talk about that later.“

Keith nodded; he’d do whatever Shiro wanted if it meant he would let him see Lance. He understood the Black Paladin was only trying to help; he even knew that it _would_ help—but Keith had a feeling they’d talk about a lot more than just _this_.

“Let’s go then.”

They continued their walk, and Keith spoke again, his voice a little more hesitant than it had been earlier.

“Lance, he freaked out when Allura said something about the pods, didn’t he? I’m not imagining that?”

Shiro shook his head slowly. “No, you’re not.”

“I didn’t know he was claustrophobic, I mean- after the castle attacked us, I didn’t think it was that bad, Shiro, you’ve got to believe me, I didn’t know-”

“Keith,” Shiro interrupted him, “this is not your fault. The- claustrophobia is a symptom of a toxin that Coran theorizes you were both exposed to during your time… with them.”

“So it will go away?” Keith ignored everything else. “Why haven’t you sedated him, and put him in the regeneration pod anyways? I get he won’t like it when he comes out, but I’d rather have him unhappy and alive than- Shiro,” he pleaded, “please. He needs the cryo-pod _badly_.“

“Trust me, Keith.” Shiro’s voice was heavy and filled with pain. “We know.”

Keith squeezed his eyes shut. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.  
He’d been in a pod for hours, he should have realized they’d had to take care of Lance while he was healing. He should have realized they would have good reasons for the decisions that they had made without him.

They had reached Lance’s door, and Shiro pulled Keith into a warm hug, leaning his cheek against the top of Keith's head as he sighed. “Don’t be. What you two went through- I wish you hadn’t ever been in that situation.”

Keith shuddered and leaned into the hug. He’d never been the sort to seek out human contact in the past; he wouldn’t reject it when offered, but it hadn’t been something he needed. Now, he knew differently. He did need this.

“So why didn’t you put him in a pod after you sedated him—?” Keith stopped talking and pulled back suddenly as something occurred to him. Shiro met his gaze with worried eyes. “Wait, you said that we were both exposed to the toxin,” Keith continued, “why didn’t I freak out at the mention of a pod like Lance did?”

“Well,” Shiro took a deep breath before answering, “the easiest way to say it is that the toxin affects everyone in a slightly _different_ way.”

Keith’s eyes narrowed just a bit; Shiro was holding back, he knew that look. “But that’s not really it,” he asked slowly, “is it?”

Shiro took another breath, reluctant to speak. “Not quite. Keith-“

“Shiro…”

The Black Paladin sighed, and once again Keith found a pained look in his eyes before he could blink it away. “It seems that due to your, well, unique DNA, you’re immune to some of the traditional effects of the toxin.”

“Some?” Keith hissed. “What other effects are there besides Claustrophobia?”

“Well, if it is what they think it is,” Shiro started slowly, “ Coran said that typical side effects include confusion, claustrophobia, an increased production of adrenaline causing hyperactivity, and in some cases, hallucinations. It also seems to affect humans worse than it does either the Galra or Alteans, regardless of the fact that humans are… less likely to feel its effects.”

Keith pulled in a shaky breath.

“To answer your other question;” Shiro continued, “we can’t put Lance into the pod until the toxin is completely out of his system. Coran and Allura were both adamant about this. It seems that in the past, the sudden shock of Altean technology has only made things worse.”

Keith didn’t know whether to be relieved or start freaking out. They knew something about this toxin at least… it just wasn’t very helpful information.

As it was, he frowned and tried to focus on what had been eating at his mind. “So I get none of the side effects, while Lance gets all of them? That isn’t right-”

“Keith,” Shiro interrupted. “You did have some of the side effects. It’s how Coran realized that there was something more than typical shock, or head injuries affecting the two of you. Between us having to sedate Lance because we couldn’t calm him down after the pod incident, and you, well, seeing things that weren’t there—“ he shuddered. “Fortunately Coran was able to put the pieces together pretty quickly.”

“Quickly enough that you realized putting Lance in a healing pod could be a death sentence.”

Shiro nodded. “Coran’s trying to find confirmation in the castle databanks now.”

Keith took a breath. “Well, that’s good. I guess... but- wait, Shiro, how could i go in a pod? Why aren't i dead?”

Shiro grimaced. "The truth?"

Keith nodded. Obviously.

The Black Paladin took a deep breath. "Luck."

"Are you serious?"

Shiro nodded, and had trouble keeping his eyes on Keith. "You- uhh, you were already in a pod by the time Coran connected the dots about the toxin... Keith, you have to understand, you were bleeding out, and after we sedated Lance you kinda lost it and we had to put you under too...

Keith shook his head and inhaled deeply. "Shiro, i get it. There was no other choice. It was do or die, you just didn't know-"

"That the 'do' might kill you to? No. We would have never put you in if we had known the risks. We would have found another option." Frowning, Shiro looked back up at him. "But remember how i said your unique DNA made you immune to some of the toxin's effects?"

"Yeah..." Keith answered slowly.

"Fortunately the pods were one of them. You were fine. Lance- Lance wouldn't have been."

That was good then. As the realization of the course of events settled in his mind, his need to see Lance was even stronger.

If Keith hadn't taken the hit for Lance during their escape, if he hadn't been in more immediate danger than the Blue Paladin when they got back to the castle, then Lance would be dead.

After a month of keeping each other alive, that's all it would have taken.

They were still standing outside of Lance’s room, and Keith couldn’t bear to stay there any longer. He lifted his hand to wave the door open, and Shiro squeezed his shoulder gently. “Remember, although he hasn’t been in a pod yet, we _will_ get him to one. Coran estimates about twelve more earth hours before it's safe. Also, more sedatives could be dangerous in his state, and we don’t want to have to give him more if we can help it, so try to not wake him.”

Inhaling deeply, Keith nodded. _Lance_ , he thought, as he walked through the door, _you better be okay. We've survived this far, I don’t know what I’ll do if you aren’t okay_.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You can’t see what you mean to those around you-”
> 
> “Well clearly neither can you!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Dragon_Stone for beta-ing, and to Lauren for being an amazing sounding board. Thanks for putting up with my Crazy :D
> 
> Mentions of claustrophobia and torture.
> 
> Thanks for reading guys!

* * *

 

They said he was lucky, that they were fortunate that the two of them hadn’t both been affected the same way by the toxin.

Keith didn’t feel lucky.

Pidge stood as he entered, and her face flushed with relief as she all but launched herself at him to give him a hug, throwing her arms tightly around his waist.

“I’m so glad you guys are back” she whispered.

“Hey Pidge,” he whispered, ducking his head down and holding her tight. It was so, so nice to be home, and he took a moment to appreciate her words. They were back. They were really back, they were safe-

Lance-

Keith caught sight of Lance’s sleeping form on the bed over Pidge’s shoulder, and felt a palpable relief at seeing the Blue Paladin, followed by intense guilt over the fact that he could feel relieved at all.

He didn’t deserve to feel better, even slightly, not while-

He took a breath.

Lance-

Lance looked awful. None of his injuries could be more than a week old—close as he and Lance had worked out during their imprisonment, their captors had healed them up about once a week—but that didn’t mean the sight was pretty.

White bandages were wrapped around Lance’s torso and most of his forearms- Keith could see the coward who’d done that in his minds eye, some alien who’s hands kept catching on fire. Keith had done something—he couldn’t remember what—and the alien had taken offence. Lance had grabbed the guy to distract him from Keith.

There were butterfly strips on his face, those had been from the razor-like claws of the creep in charge when Keith had forgotten to bow on one occasion.

There was a large bandage on the back of his neck, a Balmeran-like species’ fist, for something else Keith didn’t remember, but it was probably his fault too.

He also knew there would be heavy bandages on Lance’s right leg; Keith could remember how that one wouldn’t stop bleeding. The pirates had refused to give them water that day, they had claimed they would need it to wash the floor that Lance had bled on; as if it were his fault they’d almost nicked an artery. As if it were his fault he’d bled at all, and not the damned trigger happy pirate behind the weapon. Keith's memory of their time wasn’t exactly chronological in his head, but he was pretty sure that injury was the oldest too.

IKeith could remember Shiro’s voice as they flew to safety in Green, talking Hunk through how to quickly bind Lance’s wound enough that he wouldn’t bleed out on the way to the castle after their escape had loosened his makeshift bandage of shirt scraps and scabs.

Knowing what Shiro had just told him, and remembering how close the voice was in his memory, Shiro‘s hands must have been sodden with Keith’s own blood.

The whole memory was tinged with the haziness and knowledge that there would have been pain, yet no memory of the pain itself. The mind was a strange being when it was trying to deal with trauma though, and Keith could remember every detail of Pidge’s quiet tear streaks. The furrow of her brow, the way she bit her lip with worry, the way she kept turning down the comms in her ear so she could focus on _flying_. The ruthless determination as she obliterated anything in her way, green had been flying so fast, faster Keith was sure than she’d ever flown before.

In the back of his mind, Red hummed assent

He didn’t know what he’d done to deserve a friend like Pidge.

There as a slight squeeze as Pidge secured her hold around him. Keith drew in another shuddering breath, and a tear fell over onto her shoulder. He let go of Pidge with a slight grimace, and grabbed the infirmary chair that she had just vacated, sliding onto he seat before his legs collapsed under him.

Not once did he take his eyes off of Lance.

Pidge and Shiro shared a worried glance that Keith didn’t miss, but also couldn’t bring himself to care about.

“He looks awful.” Keith whispered.

“Well, there have been a couple times where he scared us-”

Keith looked at her in alarm, and she hurried to finish,

“-but Coran says his condition has stabilized.” She fidgeted with her tablet.

“And there’s nothing we can do to speed it up?” He asked, “To get that toxin out so he can heal properly in a pod?”

Pidge saw him take not of her tablet and quickly turned it around, shaking her head. “I wish. It’s a waiting game right now. There were certain things we could use, ointments for the burns and infections, a numbing spray for the bad cuts and bruises, but anything more sophisticated is just too risky.” Pidge shrugged half heartedly, “but he’ll be fine-” she took a breath, and there was a second too long of hesitation. “He has to be fine.”

Keith wasn’t sure if she was trying to convince herself or him. Maybe both. Either way he appreciated it. He nodded, reaching out to wrap Lance’s hand in his own.

Shiro nodded at Pidge, and left the room.

The Green Paladin nodded back, then sat against the wall. Keith looked at her curiously.

“Hunk’s gonna bring some food,” she explained, “and Shiro’s grabbing some of those bean bag like cushions we found a couple weeks ago.” Clearly they’d discussed this earlier.

“Why?”

“Because you are exhausted dumbass. You need to sleep. This way you can stay here, and get some rest.”

“But-“

“I’ll wake you if he wakes. First you eat, then you sleep.”

Keith frowned.

“Got it?”

He made a face, but sat back in his chair. “Yeah, sure. But i’m not leaving.”

Pidge rolled her eyes then shook her head, her normally annoyed features open, honest, and solemn. “Dude. I just said you could stay here and sleep. Besides I would never—I repeat, _never_ , ask you to leave Lance.”

Where had that come from? It was a little too… emotional, for the Green Paladin; and that was coming from _him_.

Before Keith could wonder too long where the sentiment had come from, a far too cheery Yellow Paladin walked in.

“Man it is so good to see you up and around!” Hunk spoke softly, but his voice was filled with light, as he handed Pidge a bowl of green and blue mush that slightly resembled soup, and then wrapped his arms around both Keith and the chair he was sitting in. “Its been weird around here without you guys, waay to quiet, you know? Well, I guess you wouldn’t, because you weren’t here, but trust me it has. I’m just really glad you’re back. We missed you”

Keith looked up at Hunk as he released him from the lopsided hug. “Thanks big guy. I missed you too. I bet you guys got tired of Shiro’s nagging pretty quick.”

They both stared at him blankly.

What?” he asked, looking back at Lance. “Shiro goes all OCD when he’s worried. I’ve seen it before, and I don’t envy you. I’m betting it wasn’t the easiest to handle.”

There was a long silence and after a few moments Keith looked back at them, something about the quiet set his instincts on alert. As he watched, Hunk checked the door and the hall, then nodded to Pidge.

What had he said?

“What?” he asked, both confused and concerned now.

“Keith,” Pidge started carefully, then glanced over at Hunk again. He nodded, and she took a deep breath to continue. “Keith, Shiro’s barely spoken at all since you guys disappeared.”

What? Keith froze, then looked back at Lance, trying to literally turn away from what Pidge was saying. Instantly the guilt began to build up, and he shook his head back and forth, not willing to accept what Pidge was telling him.

“I mean, mission necessary stuff, or commands in the field, sure,” she continued. “But that’s about it.”

“Guys, don’t joke with me; please.”

Pidge shot a frantic look at Hunk, and he stepped in.

“Keith, it’s not a joke. Shiro hasn’t been in a good place. We’ve been doing what we can but…” he shrugged. “But we’re not you. Loosing both of you at once was really hard on all of us, but Shiro, he had a really hard time.”

So it wasn’t just Lance who’d been hurt as a direct result of his actions, but Shiro too. How had he not noticed?

Hunk nodded sadly, unknowingly answering Keith’s question. “As soon as we found you guys, it was like flicking a switch, you know? We got back to the castle- no, even before that, when we found you in that awful ship, all of a sudden he was talking to us again, like nothing had happened.”

“Is he… going to be alright?”

“Are any of us alright?” Pidge asked softly, and Keith had no response. This was all his fault. “Right now you and Lance are our priority,” she told him, “worry about the rest of us later. Right now, let us worry about you.”

“Pidge-“

She glared at him, and he knew it was a battle he wasn’t going to win; he just didn’t have the energy. “Fine.”

“Now, you haven’t had any decent food in way too long.” She shoved the bowl Hunk had brought into his face. “Eat.”

She stared pointedly until he brought the spork to his mouth. As the goo-ish soup hit his tongue, he realized how hungry he actually was, and devoured the contents of the dish in a matter of minutes.

As he finished, Shiro arrived with a beanbag, just big enough for him to curl up on, and leagues better than anything he’d used in a month.  
Keith tried not to stare as Shiro gave him a small smile, but he couldn’t help wondering just how bad it had gotten, how much Shiro had pulled away. If he asked, would Pidge or Hunk even tell him?  
Here Shiro was, worried about him, and Keith knew that he didn’t deserve it. Enough people had been hurt in his life because of him, he needed to find a way to put an end to pain that he was a direct source of. Absently, Keith wondered if those he cared about would ever be able to worry about him hurting them, rather than be worried for him. That would be better for everyone.

Caught up in his thoughts, and avoiding Shiro’s gaze, he curled up on the makeshift bed. It was surprisingly comfortable, and Pidge had moved her chair over so that he could position himself with a view of Lance, even be able to reach out and touch him if need be.

He looked over to her on her tablet, and her scrunched up worried face, and nudged her chair with his foot to get her attention.

She looked over, features frozen in something between horror and pain.

“Thanks,” he said softly, and her expression softened into a small smile.

“Go to sleep, ‘Mullet’,” she said with a smirk. Keith knew Pidge well enough by now to hear the sisterly love in her voice, but he really hoped Lance’s monicker for him hadn’t caught on.

Still, maybe he didn’t hurt _everyone_ who came near him after all.

 

* * *

 

He startled awake to a hand on his shoulder.

Next thing Keith knew he had a knee between the Green Paladin’s shoulder blades, and Pidge was facedown, her arm twisted behind her back

“Keith, woah, it’s alright-“ Lance’s voice was quiet, soft and understanding, and just the sound of it acted like a trigger, knocking some sense into Keith. When he realized what had happened he jumped back, dropping Pidge’s arm as though it burned.

“Pidge- I’m so sorry-are you-I’m sorry!” He fumbled backwards, arms out in front of him in apology, putting distance between himself and Pidge- he had to show her that he didn’t want to hurt her, that he hadn’t meant to- she had to know he would never-

He slid down the wall as he hit it, and dropped his head into his hands.

So much for people being safe around him.

He thought he had that under _control_. That reflex hadn’t surfaced for months, what the hell was wrong with him?

Oh right. Capture. Torture. He supposed that would bring back those responses. Lovely. Living in homes, even on the street for a while; Keith had built up a wickedly brutal response to surprise as a kid, and more than once it had saved his life. It was something that he’d spent ages with Shiro unlearning at the Garrison. All his hard work was worthless though if a little time away from home could result in him attacking his closest friends—no, his _family_ , with no reason

“I’m fine, Keith, I’m fine. I didn’t mean to scare you, sorry about that.”

“S’not your fault.” He muttered. “I’m sorry, Pidge.”

She nodded. “Mmhm, maybe not my fault, but this isn’t your fault either.” She held his gaze in her own, challenging him to disagree with her. He didn’t move.  
“Now that you’re awake though, and he’s awake, I’m gonna tell Shiro, and then grab some sleep, yeah?” She rubbed her shoulder unconsciously, and Keith felt his face flare red in guilt. “You guys going to be okay on your own for a few?”

Keith looked at Lance, then nodded slowly. “You should get your arm checked out too.”

“It’s fi-“

It was Keith’s turn to glare at her, and she sighed.

“Whatever. Yeah, I’ll get it checked.”

Pidge left with a grumble, warning them to behave themselves, and Keith once again sat in her chair.

“You okay?” Lance asked after a moment, his tone gentle and far too understanding.

“Me?” Keith spluttered, “yeah, yeah I’ll be good. How are _you_ doing?”

“I’ve been better.” Lance went to push himself into a sitting position, and Keith frowned.

“I’m not sure if-“ he started.

Lance winced, then nodded.

“Yeah, maybe not” he commented, giving up and slumping back against the pillows.

Keith sighed. “I’m so sorry, Lance.”

“What for?” The Blue Paladin’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

That was a good question. What first? He was sorry that the toxin was hurting Lance like this. He was sorry he kept hurting their space family in one way or another. He was sorry that he’d been so useless when they’d been in that cell-

“Everything,” he said finally.

Lance shook his head. “Don’t do that to yourself. Just a few hours Pidge said, until this toxin is out of my system. Then I can-“ he stopped suddenly, and scrunched his face up in concentration.

“Lance?” Keith asked, “Lance what’s wrong?”

Lance took a deep breath, and focused intently on what he was saying.“ A few hours until I can be fixed up.” He winced.

Keith put the pieces together surprisingly fast. The claustrophobia was still bothering Lance; he was trying to avoid thinking about the pods, or even mentioning them.

It also didn’t seem to be working all too well. Keith knew from experience that trying not to think of something was more likely to result in that thought consuming you. Lance’s breathing sped up, and his eyes lost their focus, darting around blindly; Keith reached forward and took Lance’s hand in his own, grounding the other boy, comforting him.

“Lance, it’s okay. You’re alright.” In the same way that Lance had just stopped him from all but breaking Pidge in half, Keith pulled Lance back from the emotional precipice he was balanced on.

Lance nodded shakily, but his breathing started to even out.

Keith cursed himself. Of course he would almost recreate the same situation as the day before, risking Lance’s health with it. Of course he would, that was just so typical _Keith_.

They sat there for a while in silence, both lost in their own thoughts. Neither of them seemed to want to let go, so they didn’t. It was the only comfort they had had during their time as captives, and so that simple gesture had come to mean so much more. At the moment, Keith simply appreciated being able to feel Lance’s warm hand in his own. It was a reminder that Lance was alive, despite Keith; that they were both alive, and safe, and together, and that he wasn’t imagining this.

“Thanks.” Lance muttered.

Keith simply nodded. “Right back atcha.”

Lance gave him a small smile. “Keith-“ he asked weakly, “what happened?”

Oh. “What’s the last thing you remember?” He replied nervously, “and keep in mind the fact that I don’t remember everything either.”

Lance smirked, and Keith felt his heart lighten.

“I remember hitting that bitch in the face, and then something hit me from behind. I’m guessing that’s why my head hurts?”

Right, he’d forgotten about that. It was just what Lance needed, a concussion too. Keith sighed. “Yeah, that’s probably why.”

Lance nodded. “Then the others showed up not long after and got us out. It’s a bit of a blur, but if I’d known you had this ridiculous need to act as a human shield-”

“I won’t apologize. Especially not after nearly a whole month- did you realize it’s almost been a month?- of you taking the hits for me.”

“It isn’t a contest.”

“I never said it was.”

“Keith, you could have _died_.” His voice cracked on the last word, and his eyes shone with tears.

Keith inhaled to steady his nerves. “If I hadn’t done what I did, you _would_ have.”

Lance looked at him with disbelief, and Keith nodded sadly. Lance ducked his head.

“I’m sorry, Lance—if I’d been just a bit faster, or realized what was happening maybe neither of us would have gotten hit. But I’m glad it was me and not you.“

“Keith-“

“I’m so sorry,” his voice was faint.

“I know.” Lance whispered. “Me too.”

“Why did you do that?” he spoke softly, “provoke them? Not let me take my fair share of beatings? Why?” Keith begged. This was the one question that he hadn’t been able to ask until now, and he needed an answer.

Lance only shrugged. “It’s what we do. You took a hit protecting me right at the beginning, a hard one, if I remember correctly-.”

Keith didn’t remember, and he wasn’t sure if that meant it counted in his favour or Lance’s. Regardless, he shook his head. “Not good enough.”

“Keith- you were so-“ Lance bit his lip, trying to figure out what to say. “I guess it must have been the toxin. It affected you worse than me.”

Keith snorted.

“No, it did. I couldn’t watch them torture you when you didn’t even know what was going on. At least I knew what I was getting myself into. Besides, we both know I’m the tougher one.”

“Lance-“

“What? Not even gonna let me have this one?”

“What? No- This one, tough guy. That’s all yours. You deserve it.”

Lance nodded smugly. “Thank you.”

“You shouldn’t have though. Lance- you could have _died_.” He unconsciously quoted Lance’s words from only a few minutes earlier.

“But I didn’t.”

“Not the point. Me getting hurt or not isn’t worth your life.”

“Ahh, but that’s not your decision to make.”

“Why not?”

“Because you can’t see what you mean to those around you-”

“Well clearly neither can you!”

Lance rolled his eyes. “Let me put it simply for you. I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if you died because of me, god it was hard enough seeing you get _hurt_ because of me.”

Keith spluttered, not sure at all where Lance was getting these ideas from. “Because of you? Why would you have been responsible for my death?”

“It was my idea to go check out the cave system that that local had been talking about, so it was my fault we were taken.”

What?

“What are you talking about?” Keith demanded.

“You got hit hard, at the beginning.” He repeated “You clearly don’t remember, but I do. I wanted to go check out the caves, Shiro said don’t go alone. You volunteered to come because you heard rumours that it used to be a Luxite mine.

“Well, not really, that was just an excuse to get out of the boring party, but yeah, I volunteered to go. I remember that. Have you been thinking this the whole time?”

Lance shrugged slightly.

“Why didn’t you say something? It was just the two of us, we talked about so much else- why didn’t you mention this?”

“And potentially give them more things to torture us with? Nu-uh, no way. I was not going to do that.”

“None of this was your fault Lance.”

“Yes-“

“No. And you say you couldn’t have lived with yourself if I’d died? Imagine how I would have felt if you’d died trying to protect me.”

After a moment, Lance exhaled a small “Oh.”

The emotions, the care, Lance was realizing, it went both ways. There was no way it couldn’t, not after what they’d been through together.

Keith sighed. “Lance, people who care about me-“ he stopped. What was he doing? This was not the sort of thing you told others, and here he was about to-

There was a slight pressure on his palm as Lance squeezed his hand in a show of support, and Keith found in it the strength to finish. “People who care about me, even a little bit; they get hurt. Always.”

“Aw Keith, no, that’s not your fault.”

Keith frowned.“I- I know that. Or at least, there’s a part of me that does. But there’s another part that can’t help but see the connection- Lance, almost all of what I can remember is the sight of you, getting your ass kicked.” His voice was angry but soft, and tears threatened to spill over as he tried not to think too much about it, “over and over again.” He swallowed thickly, “and now you can’t even-“ he stopped before he could make things worse. _You can’t even go in a healing pod_. He sighed, and furiously wiped at his eyes. “This sucks. It sucks, a lot.”

“Yeah, it does.”

They sat for a while in silence. Keith was trying his best not to think of their time in the prison, the guilt Lance carried for all the wrong reasons, and having very little luck.

Lance suddenly shivered, his whole frame rattling. “Can you grab me another blanket? It’s freezing in here.”

Keith frowned. The hand he was holding felt warm, not cold. Despite that, Keith nodded, reaching to grab several blankets from the back of the cupboard and gently tossing them over Lance. Not so discreetly as he sat back down, he pressed the back of his hand to Lance’s head, and his brow furrowed with worry. “Lance-“ he said cautiously.

Lance’s teeth chattered as he spoke, and the quick progression of symptoms alarmed Keith.

“Yeah,” he said, and he sounded annoyed. “I know.”

Keith immediately activated his comms. “Shiro?”

The strong voice spoke back almost immediately. “Keith? Is everything alright?”

“Not, not really. Lance has a fever.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I hate this. I hate not being able to do anything-“
> 
> “I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! First and foremost I want to say THANK YOU for all the amazing comments and Kudos. You guys are much too kind!  
> Second- In this chapter, Shiro refers to Pidge/Katie by both names. I'm not confused, but i'm not going to write it all out here... If you want to know why please read wingedflower's comment on Ch1 and my response there. :D  
> LAST but not least; THANK YOU to Dragon_Stone for beta-ing, and to Lauren for simply being amazing with advice and opinions, (also for helping me make the science not absolutely cringeworthy. XD) 
> 
> You guys are all incredible! Thanks for reading!

 

The first few minutes after they’d gotten back from the rescue were the most trying.

_“Keith, please!” Shiro begged as Coran held the Red Paladin down. He wasn’t sure where Keith was pulling the energy to even try to sit up, but it really wasn’t good for him and-_

_“LANCE!”_

_Shiro’s heart tore at the shriek that came from Keith’s lungs. It was desperate and pleading and **painful** , and as Shiro turned to help the now unconscious Lance onto a bed where they could properly assess his injuries, he could feel Keith’s eyes burning into him._

_“Keith,” he called over his shoulder, tears streaming down his face, “Please, let Coran-“_

_“LANCE!” Keith yelled, his strength dwindling away as the sedative Coran had given him moments earlier started to take effect; but he was fighting it. “Lance,” he said, “Lance, please, talk to me!” he begged._

_“Keith, Lance is fine-“ Shiro tried to explain. That they had sedated him, that Lance’s panic and claustrophobia had threatened to injure him further; that Lance wasn’t ignoring Keith, that he wasn’t **dead**._

_“Then why isn’t he- Lance!” Keith’s voice was strangled_

_Keith wasn’t in a place where he could understand. The blood loss from his injuries, and as they would learn later, the effects of the toxin, were preventing that._

_“Allura-” Shiro urged_

_The Princess nodded hurriedly as she input the specifics of Keith’s condition into the healing pod._

_“Lance-“ Keith whimpered, and then turned it into a soft question. “Lance?”_

_“Keith-“_

_“You were his hero, you know that?” Keith forced out the words as even his eyes shut against his will. “You were his hero.” He muttered. “How could you let this happen?”_

_There was something in Keith’s voice, he couldn’t place it..._

 

“Shiro?”

He looked up at Allura’s voice, apparently having traveled the distance from the kitchen where he’d heard Keith’s message, to the bridge to talk to Coran and Allura, completely lost in his thoughts.

Shiro rubbed his eyes with his palm, hiding evidence of his tears. “Yes?” He murmured to both Alteans.  
  
Keith had used the open channel (so the whole castle had heard him,) and the Alteans had promptly (over a private channel,) _insisted_  he come and see them before checking on Lance. They wouldn't delay him without a good reason.

Allura nodded at Coran, who began to speak.

“My suspicions about the toxin were right! I was finally able to find it in the castle’s databanks. The plant that the toxin is derived from has evolved somewhat—it’s been ten thousand years after all—but not enough that Coran the Detective couldn’t find it!” The last statement was accompanied by an absurd amount of flailing limbs and tossing of the head, and finished with a double thumbs up.

Allura cleared her throat.

“Ah, yes,” Coran refocused. “The toxin is indeed a rare substance, but a very powerful one! Due to the effects it can have on the Galra, Zarkon’s empire has nearly hunted the berries that the toxin is extracted from into extinction!”

Shiro frowned. “But Keith is fine, now. It’s Lance-“

“Genetics work in strange ways, my young Paladin. It seems that the human element in Keith's DNA effectively made him immune to many of the toxin’s effects, including the genetic sequence of the toxin that reacts badly to our elite ancient Altean technology. However, human DNA is the catalyst that is exacerbating those same effects in Lance. As unfortunate as it is for our poor Paladin, It’s really a fascinating case!”

“So being part human saved Keith, but being entirely human is killing Lance?”

“I’m afraid so.” Allura grimaced. “It is seems that the human system is less susceptible to the toxin overall, but the symptoms, when felt, are far, far worse. Keith is lucky; he has just the right genetic sequencing with bits of both Galra and Human. The combination makes him immune to some of the worst effects.”

“Can we use that- that immunity somehow to help Lance?”

“Coran’s looking into it.” Allura nodded at the redhead, and he grinned, trying to shoot Shiro what was undoubtedly supposed to be a reassuring look, before stumbling at Shiro’s deadpan gaze.

“Actually- I’m just going to- get back on that? Number Five wanted to talk about something… Princess?”

She nodded permission for him to leave. “Let me know if you find anything.”

“Of course.” Coran hurried out, tapping away furiously on his tablet.

“Why would the pirates use this toxin?” Shiro asked Allura as the door shut. “It must be incredibly valuable, why would they waste it knowing it could kill their victims, after having gone to so much trouble to take them alive?”

“In small amounts, use of the toxin has been recorded to be an effective aid in the questioning of unwilling participants. It disorients them, causing hallucinations and such. Barbaric, but effective. I suspect they decided to try it when our Paladins didn’t give them any information they could use in a timely manner.”

Shiro frowned; Allura wouldn’t have mentioned ‘small amounts’ if it weren’t relevant. “And how much did Lance and Keith have in their systems?”

“Well, they’d clearly been dosing them for a sustained amount of time…” she bit her lip nervously

“Allura.”

“As Coran was saying, this substance is extremely rare. Few would know of its existence after all this time, let alone the proper means to both create it and make use of it…” she looked away for a moment, her eyes filled with pain. “The toxin that Lance and Keith were exposed to, well, it’s changed slightly over the last ten thousand years, it seems that the refinement process has… improved.” She winced. “We don’t know /exactly/ how potent it is today, however simulations on the castle systems indicate that if anything-” Allura took a deep breath to steady her nerves, “if anything the toxin is significantly stronger than before.”

Shiro’s face blanched. “Allura. How much?” he asked weakly.

“When-when we rescued them, they each had nearly triple the amount that was considered safe in the past. Honestly, it’s a wonder that they survived long enough for us to find them.” She admitted. “I’m sorry, Shiro… Medically, there is very little we can do for- for Lance.”

Shiro shut his eyes, taking a deep breath in an effort to calm himself. The thought of even the possibility of losing a member of his team was incredibly painful, he knew wasn’t strong enough to handle that sort of situation.

No- they needed him to be strong. He was their Leader, and they deserved someone they could count on. He was no good to Lance, or Keith, or Katie, or Hunk if he was this broken himself.

He couldn’t let it show.

“Lance is strong though. A Galra or even an Altean would already be dead after that much exposure. You humans are an amazing species. I have full confidence in his ability to best this toxin,” Allura added, placing a hand gently on his.

“I hate this. I hate not being able to do anything-“

“I know.”

Shiro nodded sadly, then turned to leave, intending to check on Lance. “Anything else?” he asked a little belatedly.

She nodded. “Actually, yes. Do you have a set of the portable comms Pidge and Hunk put together a few weeks ago?

Of course he did. He nodded.

“Then go. I can talk you through it on the way over.”

 

* * *

 

Hunk stepped out of Lance's room, having just dropped off some water boxes, and as he stopped Shiro gave the worried Yellow Paladin’s shoulder a squeeze in support. Hunk smiled grimly back.

“The water’s for both of them, don’t let Keith get away with not drinking any,” he warned.

Shiro nodded.

“Shiro?” Hunk asked quietly

“Yeah, Hunk?”

“It’s bad, isn't it?”

Shiro took a long breath. “Pretty bad.”

Hunk nodded solemnly. “What can I do to help?”

Shiro thought for a short moment. "Find Pidge? Make sure she’s doing alright? I heard Coran mention something about her shoulder when he forgot to turn off his comms, and its worrying me how she won’t put down her tablet…”

“Crazy little gremlin. You got it." He paused before continuing nervously. "Take care of him until I get back?”

Shiro nodded. “You know I will.”

“Lance?” Shiro called softly, poking his head around the door. Walking in, Shiro could see the Blue Paladin shivering as he curled as much as he could into Keith. The Red Paladin had moved from his chair and was currently leaning against the wall on the bed next to Lance; trying to share some of his body heat, desperate to provide help however he could. Lance was propped up slightly against his chest, and Keith had his arm wrapped around Lance’s shoulders. It didn’t exactly look comfortable, but neither of them seemed to care.

Keith looked up at the sound of Shiro’s voice, and the pain in his eyes almost caused Shiro to trip as he walked towards them “How-how is he?” he asked softly.

“Not quite- with it.” Keith answered, swallowing thickly.”It all happened so fast. And he’s in pain- Shiro what took you so long?”

“Keith,” he said gently, as he came forward. “You called me five minutes ago. I spoke to Allura and Coran, and then came straight here.”

He sat in front of the bed, reaching out to stroke Lance’s cheek, hating the shell of a boy that Lance had been reduced to.

His hand came away warm; Lance was hot, way too hot, way too quickly.

“I know, I know-“ Keith offered, and Shiro wasn’t sure if he was answering his verbal remarks, or the silent one about the fever. Keith ducked down, and pressed his forehead against Lance’s sweaty hair. “Is there anything we can give him?

Shiro shook his head grimly at Keith, “Just cold compresses,” he said, and then turned his full attention to Lance. “Lance?” He prompted. “Lance, can you hear me? Lance, buddy, I need you to wake up.”

Lance groaned. “Sh’ro?”

“Yeah, yeah it’s me. Lance, Keith said you were hurting.” He paused. He and Allura had talked about this on the walk over; if Lance was in pain, that was actually a good sign. It meant his body was fighting the toxin. If he was numb, however… he remembered the anguish in Allura’s voice as she recalled other encounters with the toxin in her youth. “Lance,” he repeated, “Can you tell me where it hurts?”

“Where doesn’t it hurt?” Lance tried to joke, the punchline marred by his grimace.

Shiro’s relief was visible, and Keith frowned in response. “Shiro, he’s in pain, that’s not a good thing!”

“Actually, it is,” he said softly. “Lance, just rest, okay? I’m sorry I had to wake you. Go back to sleep.”

Lance still hadn't even opened his eyes, but he nodded slightly and pressed his head against Keith’s shoulder, trying to curl even further into the other boy for warmth. Keith didn’t seem to mind, and he rubbed his hand up and down Lance’s arm soothingly.

“Shiro?” Keith pleaded, needing answers.

Shiro smiled slightly. “The pain is a good sign. It means his body is fighting against the toxin.”

“Oh.” There was a pause as Keith thought the information over. “Are you sure?”

Shiro nodded. “Yeah, we’re sure.”

Keith ducked his head down into Lance’s hair again, and exhaled in relief.

“That’s- that’s good then.”

Shiro sat back into the chair. “Its better than the alternative. We still need to keep a close eye on him though; he’s not out of the woods yet.” Reaching over, he passed Keith a box of water from the collection that Hunk had piled on the desk, then used another to dampen a facecloth before placing it on Lance’s forehead. “How are you doing?”

“I’m fine, Shiro,” he said, frowning at the box, but taking it nonetheless, “I got to go into the healing pod.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“How are _you_  doing?” he retorted, and Shiro sighed, choosing to simply wait out the younger Paladin rather than argue with him.

Keith didn’t answer for a little while, and Shiro didn’t push him. Eventually, Keith squeezed his eyes shut, and grimaced.

“It’s just not fair.”

Shiro shook his head. “No, it isn’t.”

“That should be me- he doesn’t deserve this.”

Shiro frowned. “You don’t deserve this either Keith.”

“Maybe I do. He- he protected me.” Keith spat the words out, both hating that he’d needed protection, and hating that Lance had gotten hurt providing it. “When they first grabbed us- he kept provoking them. Whenever they came towards me- he would say something, do something- you know how he can be.”

Shiro did.

“I- I was useless- a mess, I couldn’t keep anything straight in my head. I’m still not sure what really happened. And I guess, they fell into habits as the days passed. No matter what I did, Shiro, they would choose him. All I know is that it’s thanks to Lance that I’m here, alive.”

“Keith- this isn’t your fault, the toxin affected you both, just in different ways.”

Lance stirred in Keith's arms, and Keith subtly adjusted to compensate for the movement. “Of course it’s my fault.” He hissed. “Lance is hurting. I should have been able to stop it. What kind of Paladin am I?”

“Keith-“

“Shiro-” he interrupted, “why does everyone I care about end up getting hurt?”

“No, Keith, don’t go down that road.” Shiro pleaded, “I know its not gonna change much hearing me say it, but you cant think like that. Everyone gets hurt, Keith, at one point or another. You can’t blame yourself every time something goes wrong.”

“You’re right, it doesn't change much.”

“I’ll remind you.”

Keith’s glare was somewhat mitigated by the redness of his eyes from the tears, and after a moment he deflected again. Shiro cursed to himself, because he knew Keith had probably learnt that trick from him.

“How are you doing, Shiro?” he repeated his earlier question, ignoring Shiro’s statement.

“Better.” he said truthfully. He was doing better, and he’d be even better still when Lance was free and clear of the toxin.

“I heard a little of what happened while we were… gone.”

Oh.

“Oh?” he asked innocently

“Shiro, you can’t shut down like that. I know you like to embody the ‘leader image’ that the Garrison likes to promote- but it’s different out here.”

Shiro didn’t know what to-

Well, he hadn’t quite been expecting Keith to call him out like this.

Keith continued. “They may need you, Shiro, but you need them too.”

Wait. They? Them? Instantly Shiro’s concern shifted. Whatever Keith was going to say about him didn’t seem to matter anymore.

When had Keith started thinking of himself as separate from the group? How long had this been going on? Since they’d been kidnapped? Longer? Was this Shiro’s fault, because of his insistence that Keith should lead after him?

“And you,” he said.

“What?”

“We need you too, Keith, just like you need us”

“I- I know.” He spluttered.

Shiro wasn’t so sure that he did.

 

* * *

 

Later, once Hunk had replaced him at Lance’s bedside, and in the middle of his rounds checking on everyone else, Shiro’s eyes widened as Katie sat with an Altean ice pack and tried to explain what she’d found.

“Video feed. Or rather, that program I’ve been developing, the one that can be uploaded onto a ship or server so long as Green has physical contact with the ship? It found something- not that I was working on that instead of trying to find Lance and Keith, because you know I would never- but it found something that met the original criteria it was programmed to seek out. I- mean-I didn’t ask it to look for something relating to Keith and Lance, which I totally would have had I thought about it, or had the time, but I didn’t even realize it had been sent out-“

“Pidge-”

“And the program still has its base coding, obviously, and that was enough… of course it doesn’t hurt that I’d initially programmed it to seek out intel or flags of a very _specific_ nature, in the grand scope of things-”

“Katie. C’mmon. Breathe, then give it to me in English.” Her words were vaguely familiar, he remembered her saying something about this project over a month ago. Right now though, he just needed to know about the video she’d briefly mentioned. “What was the program looking for, and what does it have to do with videos? Or Lance and Keith?”

“Well, originally it would send back anything that could help me find my family. The keyword I chose being: ‘Human’- I didn’t think I’d get very many false hits that way, you know? So long as we’re close enough for the program to latch on to the secure subspace band that Coran helped me set up, it’ll send me any matches.”

After a moment, he did his best to clarify in terms he could understand. “You programmed a virus to spy on and steal from the Galra?”

“No- well, not just the Galra, it’s also compatible with…“ she grimaced, then looked up sheepishly “Yeah?”

This girl. Did she even realize how brilliant she was?

“Anyway,” she continued, “I hadn’t even realized the program had uploaded itself onto their system when I found the files on the subspace band. Apparently my program sent the logs over not long before I triggered the self destruct and we got out of there. These videos, Shiro- Lance and Keith-” she bit her lip nervously. “It’s not pretty.”

Shiro swallowed, his throat tight. “Have you had a chance to-“

She nodded slowly. “I wanted to talk to you before watching any more.”

“What did you find?” he asked nervously.

“Pirates, but we already knew that. Looks like they were hoping to score double, getting one Galra encampment to pay them for intel they’d gotten from captive paladins, and getting another payday altogether for Lance and Keith themselves from a different Galra crew. Greedy little buggers.”

“Are we at risk?” He knew Allura had already taken them significantly out of the way, but he needed to ask.

“No, we’re fine. They hadn’t actually ‘called’ the Galra yet, so to speak,- they were waiting until they had something to sell, and our boys weren’t giving up anything. That actually worked to our advantage; there’s no new Galra on our tails. Just the typical suspects, as well as whoever wasn’t on the ship when we blew it up.”

Shiro frowned, but nodded.

“Shiro, I-” she grimaced.

“Katie?” he asked, worried.

She took a deep breath. “The feed- It’s not easy to watch, and I can’t imagine anything from it will help us help Lance recover.”

He nodded slowly.

“Neither of them would want us to see it either.”

No, he couldn’t imagine that they would.

“I just want you to think about that before you ask me for the footage, because I know you will.”

He stood there for a long moment. She was right, he was going to ask for it, but the fact that she felt the need to warn him in such a way amped up the worry already nestled in the pit of his stomach. “What have you seen so far?”

Katie took a deep breath. “They started by taking turns torturing them for information in front of each other.”

Shit.

“It looks like they had this handheld device that could heal most injuries, but they only used it for the really bad ones, and it really took it out of whoever was being healed. They used it on Keith’s head when they first got there… and then after a couple of days they started torturing one and talking to the other–Shiro, they were handcuffed just far enough away from each other. They couldn’t even help each administer first aid when their captors decided that the injuries weren’t life threatening enough to merit bringing out their machine.“ Katie’s eyes shone with unfallen tears, and she hastily wiped them away.

Shiro winced at her words.

“I can’t find anything that proves when they first poisoned them with the toxin, but I can guess based on Keith’s actions, and Lance’s in return; only a couple of days in? I think it was in their food, but I can’t be sure. I also remember Coran saying something about Humans having a higher tolerance? It makes sense that they dosed them both at the same time, but Lance didn’t feel the effects until later.” She sighed, “Mostly though, they talked to Keith-“

“And hurt Lance,” he said, his voice barely audible

“Yeah.”

“Keith,” Shiro said hesitantly, “he thinks Lance provoked them on purpose.”

Katie nodded.

“He’s right?”

“Yeah, that’s about exactly what he did.” Uncomfortably she shifted the ice pack, then glared at it and tossed it to the ground. “Keith looked- pretty out of it,” she said softly, and her voice nearly cracked as she continued. “Most of the time Lance seemed to be taking care of Keith as best as he could. Protecting him.”

Shiro frowned. Katie’s knowledge was more extensive than what she’d implied to him earlier; he suspected she was trying not to let on how much she’d actually seen. His eyes flicked between her, and the screen in front of her. The tablet that she still hadn’t put down.

“I skimmed it-“ she said defensively, catching his gaze.

“Katie-“

She sighed. “Most of it. Ok?” she admitted, “I watched most of it. On fast forward, but that was bad enough. And I skipped the torture sessions when they weren't asking anything. Not that either of them gave up anything,” she noted, a hint of pride in her voice.

He hated it, hated this whole situation. What it had done to Lance, and Keith, the effects he could still see playing out in their actions. He hated it so much. “You should have told me.”

“You had better things to worry about. Like keeping them alive ”

So that meant she must have found the footage right when they got back. He shivered as he remembered the state of their rescued Paladins; Lance in the midst of a full blown panic attack for which they’d had to sedate him, and Keith’s almost identical reaction when he saw Lance’s unconscious form. The pain in both of their voices would haunt Shiro for a long time to come—

The realization hit him just then. It wasn’t that he hadn’t recognized Keith’s tone earlier, but that the answer had just been too painful to admit. _Betrayal_. That’s what he’d heard. Keith had thought that Shiro had let Lance _die_.

He reached out an arm to catch himself on the table before he fell over, aiming for a natural looking motion but falling more into the clumsy realm.

He was suddenly so, so glad that Keith didn't remember any of that.

“Shiro?” Katie asked, her voice quiet, concerned.

He shook it off, turning the conversation back on her. “Anything that I should know?”

If she’d seen the security footage, then he wanted her opinion. He’d watch them eventually, he needed to know what they’d been through if he wanted to be of any use, but he wasn’t going to ignore the fact that he had a resource in Katie now. She’d already watched the most pertinent footage. Regardless of how it pained him that she’d done so, he wasn’t going to let it go to waste. He wanted her thoughts.

Katie fidgeted for a second before looking up with wide eyes. “I know you want someone to swap places with Keith, force him to get some more rest.”

“Yeah, I do.” He wasn’t sure what she was getting at. “He needs to heal too, he only came out of the pod a few hours ago.”

“Don’t.” She took a breath. “Please, Shiro? Don’t. Have someone else in there, with them, watching them, whatever, that’s fine; but don’t ask him to leave Lance. Don’t ask Lance to wakeup without Keith being there.”

The tears in her eyes, her posture, her tone, they spoke volumes.

“Okay,” he said softly after a minute of consideration. He could do that.

She nodded.

‘C’mmere.” Shiro pulled her into a hug. “We got them back. I told you we would. They’re here, safe in the Castle, with us, where we can watch out for them, and protect them.”

“I always knew we would; but Lance-“ she shivered. “I should have found them sooner.“

“Not you too." He pulled her closer, "Please don’t do that, don’t blame yourself. We’ve got some of the most advanced technology I’ve ever seen in this Castle. He’ll pull through. We’ll help him. Yeah?”

He felt Katie nod against his chest. "Yeah.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You can’t promise things like that,” Keith muttered.
> 
> “You know me, I’m going to anyways.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I apologize in advance for the ending, :-P (but not really. You know how it goes :-) )
> 
> Thank you to Dragon_Stone for beta-ing and to Lauren for putting up with my need to talk this fic out. (Also... science stuff is a little less cringeworthy, thanks girl :D)
> 
> Thank you to everyone who reads and comments- you guys are all BEAUTIFUL human beings and if i could i would give you all ENORMOUS HUGS. Unless hugging isn't your thing, in which case i'll send a wave or a high five your way.
> 
> Warnings: Keith does have a flashback of sorts in this chapter.
> 
> Enjoy! ~M

Lance groaned and tried to kick away the offending blankets. A soft cry escaped his lips as his movement pulled at his injuries, and he curled into himself slightly against the pain.

“Hey, stop, stop, don’t move. Stitches, remember?” Keith spoke gently

Lance shook his head, but stilled, clearly still half asleep. “Hot,” he murmured, “it’s too hot.”

“Alright, shh, don’t move. I’ll get them.”

Reaching over, Keith pulled away the blankets covering Lance, and his gut clenched as he saw a sheen of sweat on the Blue Paladin’s skin. The fabric of Lance’s boxers and muscle shirt clung to his skin wherever bandages didn’t stop them, and Lance weakly pulled an arm around his stomach, to shield it from the pain. Keith gently combed Lance’s bangs out of his face, noting that his temperature finally seemed better, before reaching for the towel and fresh bowl of cool water that Shiro had brought in a little while ago. As Keith dabbed it at Lance’s temple, Lance haphazardly pushed the cold cloth away. The Red Paladin frowned.

“Keith?” Lance’s tone was turning frantic, and Keith could feel the tension building in his slender frame.

“Hey, I’m right here.” He was still sitting beside Lance, propped up in the corner on the bed in Lance’s quarters, the Blue Paladin using his thigh as a pillow. “How are you feeling?”

“I-Keith,” he said, searching for and then grasping Keith’s hand desperately in his own. “Where are we?”

“Wha- Lance? We’re on the Castle. Don’t you remember?”

“Nonono-”He shook his head vigorously, or tried to- Keith held him as still as he could manage.

“Lance, stop that, you’ll make your concussion worse. We got out, remember? The others came, and they got us out.”

“It hurts so much Keith, we can’t be back. This has to be another trick.” Lance turned his head to catch Keith’s eye, and Keith shook his head, once again gently pushing Lance’s bangs out of his face.

“Not a trick.” He said, and a small relieved part of his brain noted that the fever haze seemed to be fading from Lance’s eyes. Maybe this would be the last time Keith had to placate a delirious Lance.

“Lance, I promise it’s not.” He continued, “We’re safe. They’re not going to hurt you, or me, either of us, ever again.”

“Are you sure? Are you sure we got out? Because you’ve been seeing things that aren’t there for days now. It was only a matter of time before I joined you.”

Interesting... Lance hadn’t mentioned that before. Keith leant forward, gently touching his forehead to Lance’s for a moment with a sad sigh and closed eyes. “I’m not making this up,” he vowed as he straightened.

Lance looked around, nodded, and Keith felt him relax slightly; muscles released their nervous tension as he registered their surroundings at full value. “Okay,” he accepted simply.

Although he liked how it felt, Keith wasn’t sure he deserved such blind trust.

“So if we’re in the Castle,” Lance said hesitantly, “why’re you in my room?”

Keith huffed back a chuckle. Of course that’s what Lance would pick out as strange. “Because you’re not doing so great.”

Lance stilled, and Keith frowned in concern. “Lance?”

“Oh,” Lance’s tone was heavy with understanding.

“Lance?” he prompted again.

“They drugged us didn’t they?” He asked the question gently, as if he were afraid he might be right. As if he wanted to have imagined it all. Keith didn’t blame him. “That’s why my whole body is aching. I-I remember now, Pidge was saying something about Human, and Galra, and this rare plant--.” He sighed. “So that was real?”

“Yeah,” Keith replied, equally as quiet.

Lance chuckled weakly, “man, I called it.”

“Called what?”

“In the cell, there was no way that pain alone would have made you act like that. I knew something had to be up.”

Lance had way too much faith in him. “Ah,” Keith exhaled.

“You’re okay now though?”

“Yeah,” Keith grimaced. “I’m fine, it’s y-“

“Good,” Lance interrupted him, and turned back to look in his eyes again. “If you’re fine now, then I _have_  to have imagined _some_  of it. Which means it might not _all_ be real.”

Keith hated the idea of breaking Lance’s illusion of hope, but the chances that what he remembered hadn’t been real were slim. It was hard to imagine worse than what they’d been through. He spoke again as Lance clenched his hand in his own. “What part isn’t real?” he asked nervously.

“The part where your healing pod malfunctioned? Please tell me that didn’t happen.”

Well that one came out of left field. “Nope,” Keith said, “Well, at least not that I know of.”

“Ok, phew.”

Keith gently combed his fingers through Lance’s hair as the Blue Paladin continued. “I have this image in my head, it’s—a little scary, actually, I didn’t know Shiro’s face could be that…” Lance took a breath, and held Keith’s hand even tighter. “Empty.”

Keith returned the squeeze. He should have expected that the thing which would scare Lance more than any torture was the thought of his friends being hurt. “I’m fine, the healing pod worked just like it always does. It’s you who we’re worried about. Who I’m worried about.”

Lance turned his head and looked up at Keith with those big blue eyes. “There was something about the poison ‘corrupting key parts of my nervous system’, as well as a bunch of other stuff I don’t really remember….” He bit his lip nervously, searching Keith’s face for an answer. “Does that sound right? That the healing pods wouldn’t know which ‘anomalous code’ or whatever to target and fix? And if the pods aren’t calibrated exactly right, they could overload my system in an effort to recode it?”

“Lance- slow down- _what are you saying_?!” Since when did Lance speak science?

Lance shrugged. “I dunno, it’s Pidge speak.” Ahh, that made a little more sense. “ ‘My brain is corrupted’ is pretty much all I got out of it.”

“It’s not corrupted,” Keith offered.

“What would you call it then?”

That was slightly more difficult. “Temporarily incapacitated?”

Lance chuckled silently. “Ooh, big words from mullet over here.”

Keith smiled.

“Alright, well me and my incapacitated brain are feeling gross. Help me up?”

Keith bit his lip, but nodded, and moved to help him sit. A few painful minutes later Lance was sitting with his back against the wall and his head on Keith’s shoulder, looking exhausted from the effort. He was no doubt still hurting, yet he reached for the towel and water to try sponging off the sweat from his arms and face.

“Lance, I really don’t think-“ Keith protested, trying to take away the cloth.

“Relax, I can handle this.” He held his hand up, not quite out of reach, but enough that Keith stopped reaching to take the hand towel from him. “Ideally, I’d love to shower, but-“ he gestured widely at the bandages covering much of his body.

“Right.”

“It’s not even the stomach wound I’m worried about, you know?” he said conversationally, and Keith winced as Lance’s tone carried none of the gravity a statement like that should. “Like, I know walking would be a bad idea for several reasons, but pretending those didn’t exist, from the way my leg is stabbing, I don’t think I could even stand up right now.”

Keith squeezed his eyes shut and turned his head away. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

“Hey,” Lance reached over and turned Keith’s head back to face him. “Not your fault.”

“All my fault.” Keith was still whispering. “They kept hurting you and I didn’t do anything- I didn’t even think of-“

“It was not- your- fault. How much of that do you really remember anyways? I’m thinking that my memory is actually better than yours right now.”

The delirium of the fever did seem to have dissipated; Lance was probably right. Keith shrugged. “Enough.”

“Liar.”

“Wha- How-?“

“If you really remembered, you would remember how every time they came, you did everything you could to talk me out of it. When that didn’t work you tried to annoy them, distract them, antagonize them so that they’d pick you to torture; oh, Keith, you tried so hard.”

“Obviously not hard enough.”

“I’m just better at knowing exactly what to say to piss people off. It’s one of my many talents.”

Keith grimaced, then caught sight of the bandages on Lance’s wrist. There was no rhyme or reason to it; he’d seen them earlier, but this time he immediately lost his train of thought—

The bandages were from the cuffs. The chains.

It was as though he could see it now, in front of him; Lance cuffed to a bar on one side of the room, and Keith on the other. Only by reaching the length of their arms across the cell had they been able to grab hands, and find some comfort in that dark. Keith remembered begging Lance, coaxing, pleading with him to reach out just so that their fingertips could graze. Lance always would, no matter how much the pirates had hurt him. He’d somehow understood that Keith needed that touch to reassure himself that Lance was still there, that he wasn’t imagining things, that he wasn’t /alone/.

There was a slight pressure on his fingers; Keith blinked, and the horrid room disappeared.

“Keith, hey, hey, it’s okay. It’s okay.”

He could feel the tears streaming down his face, and Lance reached the hand that Keith wasn’t holding in a death grip up to gently wipe them away with his thumb, muttering reassurances the entire time.

Keith leant into the touch, and with a silent sob buried his face into Lance’s shoulder and neck.

Lance carded his fingers through Keith’s hair as he pulled him close. “We’re alright,” he murmured. “You’re alright, I’m alright, we made it, we’re fine.”

“No, you’re not,” Keith choked out.

“But I will be, I promise you. I’ll be fine.”

“You can’t promise things like that,” Keith muttered.

“You know me, I’m going to anyways.”

“Lance-“

“Shut up, Mullet. Let me have this one.”

Keith nodded slowly, too tired to argue. “Okay.”

 

* * *

 

Hunk checked back in on the two of them. He brought soup and more water pouches, did a quick scan to make sure Lance hadn’t ripped any stitches, and then sat for a while against the wall just keeping an eye on them.

They were back. They were really back. Lance was back, Keith was back, and they were going to be okay. He really believed that. Hunk smiled slightly as he stood to leave, simply happy that he could share the same space as them again, not worried at all that he couldn’t talk to them right then. Later, he’d tell them all about the new dish that he’d have ready for when Lance was all healed, or the new training bot he had built, but for now they rested, in front of him, and that was enough.

Hunk left as quietly as he’d come in, nodding to Shiro sitting outside to let him know that he was ready to switch. Nothing had made Hunk happier in weeks, than leaving his two friends fast asleep, clinging to the other, completely unaware of their guardian angels taking turns sitting just outside.

 

* * *

 

Despite what the Yellow Paladin had reported, when Coran stopped to check on Lance, he hadn’t expected to find the Red Paladin still napping with him on the bed. He stood and watched them be adorable for a moment, then sent a quick message to Allura and Shiro about it as a status update. He scanned Lance’s physical state to update the data he was working with, and then left them to their sleep with a nod to Pidge who sat at the door on her tablet. The solution he was working on was close, but he’d said something earlier, and he believed it still. At this point, sleep was still the closest thing to a remedy that they had for Lance.

 

* * *

 

Keith woke as Lance curled into his chest, and the Red Paladin inhaled quickly in surprise. Lance was shaking in fear, and despite his injuries had turned himself onto his side and brought his legs up to make himself as small as possible.

Keith flipped onto his side to better accommodate for Lance’s new position, and stretched his hand across Lance’s shoulder in order to rub his back, creating them a shielded area from the outside world inside his arms.

“Lance?” he asked hesitantly.

“Make it stop, make it stop- make it go away.” Lance was whimpering, his voice sharp with fear.

“Lance, I’ve got you, you’re safe.”

Lance clung to the front of Keith’s shirt. “Don’t let it hurt them,” he begged, “Don’t let it touch them. They didn’t do anything, they don’t know why I left. I can’t let it get to them…”

“I’ve got you,” Keith promised, “I’ve got you. I won’t let it hurt anyone, either here or on earth. You’re going to be fine.”

Oh, how badly he needed his own words to be true. Watching Lance in front of him, hearing his cracked and timid voice, feeling the shakes that vibrated his frame; Keith _needed_  Lance to be alright.

“You and I, we’ll keep them safe, yeah?” he continued, “We’re a great team, everyone knows it. So you just get better, then we’ll keep them safe. _Together_.”

“They don’t know what’s out here, they don’t know, and if the Galra find them it will be all my fault, and they won’t be safe. I have to protect them…”

“Shh, Lance. That’s a lot to put on your shoulders, it’s not your fault, not at all. D’you hear me? None of this is your fault, and the Galra aren’t going to Earth. I won’t let them, so that’s not your fault either.” Keith now noticed tears falling down his own cheeks, and he pulled Lance closer to him, running his fingers soothingly through Lance’s brown curls.

Keith wasn’t sure how long it was before Lance started to regain control over himself, or mental awareness, or whatever you wanted to call it. It could have been a dobash or ten vargas, the whole time Keith spoke softly, murmuring reassurances and anything he could think of to alleviate at of the worry in Lance’s voice. The way he’d left his family was both Lance’s biggest regret, and his biggest worry. If Keith hadn’t known that important detail before spending a month locked up with him, he certainly knew it now. Nothing mattered to Lance more than the safety of those he loved, and now that Keith had a family of his own in the Castle, one that included Lance, he understood.

Eventually Lance’s tone grew even—although it remained incredibly soft; and his words terrified Keith.

“You gotta promise me you’ll do whatever it takes, okay? Whatever it takes to keep them safe. My family, _our_ family, all of them.”

Keith did not like the sound of that. “Lance,” he nearly scolded. “Don’t talk like that. You’re gonna be fine.”

“I’m tired Keith. Really tired. Can you promise me? Please? Just in case?”

“Don’t you dare,” Keith threatened, tapping firmly on Lance’s cheek. He could _not_  let him fall asleep, not after saying something like that. “Don’t you dare.”

With his other hand Keith fumbled to turn his comms on. He needed Shiro here. _Now_.

“Promise? Please, Keith,” Lance begged.

“Of course I promise, you idiot. But you have to promise me you’re fighting this.” There was a soft click, and Keith knew the line was open. He didn’t know who he’d connected to, and he didn’t care. At least _someone_ would hear them.

Pidge rushed into the room from her position outside the door, a haunted look on her face at his words. Keith barely registered her presence

“Keith-“ Lance’s eyelids fluttered.

“Please, Lance,” he pleaded, tears streaking down his cheeks as he pushed himself up, grabbing Lance’s hand tight. He wasn’t sure what was worse, watching the energy suddenly leave Lance’s body or /feeling/ the weakness that overcame his grip. Reaching over, he brushed Lance’s hair back out of his face. “You promised. You said you would be fine. We need you. I need you, Lance. Don’t give up on me. Lance, please.”

In the back of his head he heard Pidge and someone else talking over the comms, and he slapped away the small hand asking for his attention on his elbow.

“I wish it were that easy,” Lance apologized, eyes shut, and Keith’s heart skipped a beat

“Lance-”

“Take care of them?” he whispered.

“No- NO, Lance!”

“You promised,” Lance breathed, the words barely understandable, but they were the only thing Keith heard.

“So did you,” he choked out desperately.

No reply.

“Lance?” Keith cried, “LANCE!”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He-He’s barely breathing,” Keith stammered, “and his pulse is so weak- Shiro-“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geesh guys; and some of you thought i'd end it there. :P
> 
> HAPPY BIRTHDAY LANCE!
> 
> Thanks to my beta Dragon_Stone, and as always to Lauren for putting up with me;
> 
> And thanks to you guys for letting me play games with your emotions :-O I'll try not to do that too much. :D
> 
> Seriously though. You guys are awesome. Enjoy! ~M

 

“Keith!” Shiro nearly shouted into the comms, not for the first time, and he was getting worried. He’d originally headed towards the infirmary, but if he needed to change directions to go get Lance he had to know _ASAP_ “Pidge,” he asked desperately, “can he hear me?”

“Yeah he- Or maybe... No-“

“Katie.” He said sternly,

“Just, just hold on a tick!” There was a moment where Shiro could only imagine what was happening, and then Katie’s voice returned.“Keith?” Her tone clearly conveyed her fear and nerves, even over the radio, “Keith, you need to listen to Shiro. We need to get Lance-”

The voice that interrupted her was hesitant, unsure. “Shiro?”

“Keith,” Shiro jumped in, not wanting to let any more time slip away, “you guys need to get Lance to the infirmary, now! We’ll meet you there!”

“He-He’s barely breathing,” Keith stammered, “and his pulse is so weak- Shiro-“

“Just go!”

“C’mmon Keith, I can’t carry him on my own. “ Katie directed Keith’s focus, and Shiro knew he could trust her to get them all to the infirmary.

“Coran? Allura?” He called out, wishing that he hadn’t decided earlier that the walk back from Black’s hangar would help clear his head, as he now sprinted down the halls.

“We heard!” Allura answered him. “Coran’s getting a pod ready. It’s the only thing that could help at this point!”

“But what about the toxin?” Hunk asked with a worried tone.

“Hunk,” Pidge started, “if we don’t, he’ll-“

“No!” Keith yelled. “He won’t, Coran we’re on our way-“

“Forty ticks!” Katie called out, and Shiro somehow increased his speed in order to be able to meet them.

Shiro skidded into the infirmary opposite from where Keith and Katie stumbled in, Lance suspended between them. The Blue Paladin was limp, his skin far too pale. There were splotches of red through the white bandages, blood from stitches that had been torn in their haste.

No longer confused about what needed to be done, or the urgency which was required, Keith took all of Lance’s weight into his arms and stumbled over to put him directly into the pod that Coran had waiting. Allura fiddled with the controls and the glass hissed shut.

Katie froze where Keith had left her in the doorway, clearly worn out. Even with tears streaking down her face, Katie looked at Shiro with a determined stubbornness. He gave her a nod in thanks, which she returned. As soon as Allura had control of the situation, Coran walked over in to put a gentle hand on her back, and Hunk wrapped her in a hug.

“Is he-?“ Keith panted, slowly sliding down against the glass and crumpling onto his knees.  
Shiro fell to the floor beside him, and pulled him into a tight hug. Keith didn’t make any effort return the embrace, but at least he didn’t push Shiro away either; instead he looked up at the Blue Paladin beside him, leant his head forwards, and cried silently into Shiro’s shoulder.

Shiro breathed a small sigh of pained relief at the action. When Keith had emerged from the healing pod with an apparent _dependence_ on Lance’s mere presence to function properly, Shiro’d been more than a little worried, and when Katie had begged him to keep them together she’d forced him to stop avoiding it. He wouldn’t begrudge either of them anything right then, he _couldn’t_ , but Shiro also couldn’t stop his mind from analyzing the situation in a much too clinical manner. That’s what he’d been trained to do.

More than once in the past day, his mind had become paralyzed with fear at the thought that if they lost Lance, they might completely lose Keith too. With everything that had happened, Shiro still wasn’t sure if Keith could survive loosing Lance.

Shiro wasn’t sure that _he_ could survive it;

-but here, and now, Keith was reacting to outside stimuli; that was a good sign. As long as Lance came out of the pod, they could fix this.

Over Keith’s shoulder, Shiro glanced at Allura, silently begging her to give him the power to tell Keith what he desperately needed to hear. She bit her lip as she looked over the new data—something he’d never seen her distressed enough to do before; and eventually nodded.

“He’s gonna be fine,” Shiro whispered, running his hand soothingly along Keith’s back. “You did it, you got him here in time. Well done, Kiddo.”

 

* * *

 

It took a whole day for the cryogenic pod to figure out what to do with the little remaining toxin left in Lance’s body. With Pidge and Hunk’s help, Coran and Allura had been working on modifying the pods. Ideally they would be able to compensate and work around the toxin while allowing it to burn itself off naturally, and the half solution that they’d cobbled together had been barely enough, and just in the nick of time.

It took another two days for Lance’s injuries to heal. Shiro brought the bean bag from earlier into the infirmary for Keith to sleep on, and Hunk kept coming with food. Hunk stayed in the infirmary watching over Lance almost as much as Keith, the main difference being that he slept in his own bed. Shiro sat with them whenever he wasn’t checking up on everyone else. In fact the only person The Black Paladin hadn’t seen in the infirmary was Katie.  
  
At one point Allura had startled Keith awake, and he had reflexively pulled his Bayard on her, catching a decent sized chunk of her hair with his blade.

It had been an accident. After he’d apologized, and she’d apologized, and he’d apologized; she’d started talking about proper sleeping patterns and pods, sedatives even, and the panic on his face had been enough for Shiro to gently pull her away into the hall.  
  
“I don’t understand.” Allura said, as Shiro led her out of earshot. “Shouldn’t he be resting properly so that he is prepared in the event of an attack? We are still fighting a war, Shiro. The Galra won’t stop because we have an injured Paladin, just like they didn’t when we had a missing one.”

“Allura,” Shiro sighed as he wrestled with his words. “Try not to look at this as such a simple matter. Just because Keith no longer needs a pod, doesn’t mean he’s ready to fight.”

“The Galra are no less of a threat, Shiro.” Her tone was stern, and he frowned. “As much as I want to give them time, time isn’t something we can afford.”

“I know. Just- think of it this way. Yes, Keith could be sleeping and recovering on his own, or even training right now. Those are actions that might better his physical state.”

“That’s my point-“

“But what about his emotional state? Taking him away from that pod, even for a short amount of time, may not be worth it in the long run. Right now he’s worried sick, likely caught in awful memories from the time he and Lance were held prisoner together, memories which none of us can even begin to understand.” Shiro paused for a moment, deliberating whether he should continue, but ultimately decided that as a leader, she had a right to know his concerns. His _fears,_  as much as he might not want to voice them.

“Allura,” he started slowly, and her eyes widened in alarm as she caught the desperate tone in his voice. “Keith and Lance are so intrinsically connected now, after their capture… It’s reassuring in a way, but it also has me worried”

She looked at him quizzically.

“Teamwork is healthy,” he explained, “co-dependence is a part of humanity, but what they have, I worry, is more than that.” Shiro took a deep breath. “Keith- has a history of anxiety, panic attacks, and flashbacks.” Shiro could see the curiosity in Allura’s eyes, but it wasn’t his place to say more. He wouldn’t have even said this much if he hadn’t thought it so important. “I had my suspicions when he first came out of the pod, but it wasn’t until Pidge confronted me with something that I really began to understand what was happening." He explained, "Keith has been having hard time, well, being _himself_ whenever Lance isn’t in his direct line of sight."

Allura frowned.

“Now Lance’s in the pod healing, finally," Shiro continued. "On the one occasion though that we were able to coax Keith away for a moment, he was so worried about Lance that he had trouble focusing even enough to answer simple questions. We can’t approach that—“ he stopped, and rephrased. “That won’t even start to heal until he can see that Lance is out of the pod, and really alright.”

Allura paused. “But-“

“Keith does everything you ask of him and more. Hunk, Pidge and I have performed acceptably against the Galra for the past month, a few more days won’t make a difference. You owe him this much, Allura.”

The Princess looked away at the not so subtle reminder of how she’d treated Keith after she’d discovered his heritage.

“I think I understand.” She hedged, but her tone was flat. “What you’re saying is that, although we have one physically injured Paladin, we also have one who is injured mentally. Of course you’re right, he needs time to heal just as much as Lance does”

Shiro exhaled in relief. “I’m glad you see that.” The last thing he wanted was for Keith or Lance’s recovery to be slowed because they didn’t give them enough time, although he wouldn’t have been so quick to limit that number of mentally strained Paladins to just ‘one’. This whole ordeal had been difficult on each of them, in one way or another. It was just something they would need to handle one step at a time.

“Keith will be fine on the bean bag for now,” he continued, “and after Lance comes out of the pod, then we’ll discuss merging mental well-being with Paladin training.”

He knew it wouldn’t be as easy as he made it sound.

“Ahh.” Allura exhaled, and suddenly looked away, refusing to meet his eyes.

Shiro frowned.

“Very well then,” she allowed as her eyes flicked back to his, her gaze carefully guarded. “As their leader, I suppose you know best.”

He nodded, but couldn’t help but feel that she wasn’t happy with how it had played out. Just something else to talk about later he supposed, after everyone was healthy.

“Thank you, Allura.”


	7. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hey guys,” Lance grinned hesitantly, “Miss me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some happy fluff(ish)!
> 
> Sorry it's so short... this was the best place to bring it to an end before part 2 starts!
> 
> Thanks to my wonderful beta Dragon_Stone, my epic bestie Lauren, and every single one of you who read, commented, kudosed, subscribed or bookmarked. It means so so much to me that you guys enjoyed this!

* * *

 

There was a soft hiss, and Lance squinted into the bright light of the infirmary. Recognizing several of the forms in front of him, he exhaled in relief. “Keith?” he asked hoarsely.

“Lance you-“ Keith shuffled in to support him as Lance’s legs wobbled. He ended up pulling Lance into a tight hug, one hand wrapped securely around his waist as his fingers wove into the back of his mop of hair, pulling him closer. “You idiot,” he muttered, but there was no real malice in his tone, only pain and gratitude.

Lance squeezed just as tightly, burying his head in Keith’s neck. “Keith-please-I- I’m not imagining this am I?”

He needed to know. They had figured out early on that Lance’s rare hallucinations were nothing like Keith’s frequent ones, and this had been the best way they had of determining if something was real or not.

“What? No, no, Lance, I see what you see. This is real. For once, absolutely everything is real.”

Lance shivered with relief.

“But don’t you dare do that again.” Keith muttered

Lance’s brain supplied the images to match Keith’s words, and he nodded hurriedly to make them go away, somehow pulling Keith even closer to him in the same action. “Yeah, I’d like that.” Dying- or at least believing that he was dying; that hadn’t been fun for him either. “I’m sorry,” he choked out.

Keith sighed, and tilted his head to rest his cheek on Lance’s mop of hair for a moment. “Yeah,” he whispered, “me too.”

Lance inhaled and smiled sadly. There was a general ache-iness to his whole body, but he knew from previous experience with the pods that it would go away in a few hours.

All of a sudden Lance felt a familiar tug, and a warmth in the back of his mind that he hadn’t felt in weeks. He hadn’t realized how much he missed it, or needed it, and if Keith hadn’t still been holding him up he most certainly would have collapsed with overwhelming joy.

“Whoa- Lance?” Keith asked, alarmed by the sudden weight in his arms.

Lance chuckled, but stood again under his own power, pulling away. “S’all good. Just- Blue.” He said dreamily. “I missed her so much- but I didn’t realize _just_ how much until she was back.”

From the smiles on the faces around him, he knew they could all relate. “Hey guys,” he grinned hesitantly, “Miss me?”

Keith reluctantly stepped back, and Hunk swooped in to give Lance his next hug.

“Ohh it is so good to have you back and not broken!” Hunk cried, wrapping Lance in a teddy bear hug, lifting him off the ground in his excitement. Lance chuckled, and when his feet touched the ground again he wouldn’t let his best friend go. He hadn’t had a ‘Hunk hug’ in way too long, and Hunk didn’t seem to mind at all. They stood there in each others arms for a considerable amount of time. “Of course I missed you buddy,” Hunk said softly, as though he knew it was exactly what Lance needed to hear. “I missed you so much. And just you wait until you see what I’ve come up with for dinner, my man, are going to LOVE it.” Hunk slowly released Lance from the hug, not completely pulling away until he knew Lance was okay with it; then he took a step back, unabashedly wiping happy tears from his eyes.

Lance laughed, then looked around, and bit his lip in confusion as the next Paladin he expected to see wasn’t there. “Where’s Pidge?” he asked, his voice small. “She’s not hurt is she?”

Hunk’s smile faltered- “Oh no, not hurt, but I’m not sure where-“

“She’s meeting us for dinner,” Keith suddenly supplied, his expression distant.

Lance nodded as he reached out a hand to grab Keith’s. True, he was little disappointed, but that was all right. He’d see her soon.

“Ok, that makes sense-“ Hunk said, then frowned. “Wait, how do you know, Keith? She hasn’t been down here- actually, I haven't seen her in a couple of days.”

Lance’s heart dropped at the idea that Pidge hadn’t come to visit him even once. Not that she needed to of course, but it would have been nice. Keith gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

“No she’s been here,” Keith informed them, and Lance smiled. “Said she was working on something big, might not be here, but she’ll see us at dinner.”

“Okay!-“ Lance froze, and a cheeky grin spread across his face. “Wait- what time is it?”

Keith shrugged.

“Well, time is relative, my boy-“ Coran said playfully from the outskirts of the group, “but somewhere close to 9 in the evening, of your earth time.”

“Okay,” Lance grinned. “That’s fine then.”

“Lance?” Hunk queried, and Keith’s brow furrowed in the same confusion.

“Well, we just don’t want to be feeding the gremlin after midnight, if you know what I mean?”

There was a chorus of groans and chuckles, and as Shiro ducked down to explain to Allura and Coran what he’d meant, Lance felt the atmosphere around him slide a little bit back to what he was used to. That was better.

“Actually- I’m gonna go get that set up- okay?” Hunk said shyly, as if he didn’t want to leave. “I’ve got the mice on pot duty and I don’t trust them in my kitchen for that long...”

Lance smiled wide again and shooed him out. “Little thieves!” he chuckled, “I want to help, but I’ll be right behind you, okay? Go, save our dinner!” He smirked as he turned, then bit his lip as he looked over at Shiro, his expression almost nervous.

Even though deep down he knew better, some part of him was worried that a hug was too much to ask for

“Come on.” Shiro smiled gently, his arms open and inviting, and Lance dropped Keith’s hand and launched himself at their tireless leader. Wrapping his arms around Shiro’s sturdy frame, Lance inhaled deeply, and instantly felt as though everything had been made better; all fear and pain melted away. Shiro could fix _everything_ , and to Lance, his hugs worked the exact same way.

Shiro put a gentle, even hesitant hand on his head, and Lance relaxed eagerly into the Black Paladin’s comforting embrace.

“I’m so glad we’ve got you back,” Shiro’s voice was quiet.

Lance nodded into Shiro’s chest. “Yeah. Me too.”

There was a long moment, then Lance felt Shiro wave at something behind him. Shiro shifted his position slightly to accommodate for the arrival of Keith, lifting his prosthetic arm around the Red Paladin as Keith wrapped his arms around them both, and Lance sighed in content.

In the arms of the person who had become something in between a best friend and a brother, and his hero, he finally felt safe.

“It’s really good to be home,” Lance whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh! There it is; part one, done! Finis! Thanks for sticking with me this far, and I hope with all my heart that you guys have a wonderful rest of the summer!
> 
> Part two will pick up right after this, and it will absolutely be longer-- although I'm not sure yet when I'm gonna start posting... i'm hoping for September?
> 
> If you want to follow me on Tumblr at iwouldntmissitfortheworld, i'll be posting updates there; You can also always just shoot me a message though, either here or there about anything really and i'll do my best to reply asap. :D
> 
> Here's to hoping S3 is as amazing as 1 and 2. (Shiro, dude, I NEED YOU TO BE OKAY!)
> 
> Really though, you guys are amazing. Thanks :D 
> 
> ~M

**Author's Note:**

> This work is complete! I'm currently writing part two in the series and decided it was about time i started posting part 1. 
> 
> I plan on posting one chapter a week, so be sure to follow to keep in the loop!
> 
> As always Kudos, Comments and Bookmarks are absolutely loved and appreciated!
> 
> Thanks for reading! ~M


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